tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5100747061833336603.post2578495752089842755..comments2023-05-12T01:10:00.164-07:00Comments on Scrum Central: An ApologyRobhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02992194211469009236noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5100747061833336603.post-9227289034145842682011-01-13T14:39:17.961-08:002011-01-13T14:39:17.961-08:00Heart-wrenching. Hang in there. Know that your fri...Heart-wrenching. Hang in there. Know that your friends are cheering for you, even if you are having a rough time with family.Madame Curiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03599079525934551325noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5100747061833336603.post-30797597220102772122011-01-09T08:39:19.775-08:002011-01-09T08:39:19.775-08:00Thanks for your letter. If you don't mind, I&#...Thanks for your letter. If you don't mind, I'm going to plagiarize parts of it in a letter to my family. (It sounds like we have had similar experiences recently.) Despite the current stretch of rough water, I have confidence that all will eventually be well. Faith and patience are the keys.<br /><br />PS: It was good meeting you at Scott's. I wish I would have taken more of an opportunity to visit with you. Maybe next time.Clive Durhamhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13429000026909551119noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5100747061833336603.post-17245576556772618252011-01-06T09:05:12.922-08:002011-01-06T09:05:12.922-08:00Well done. Some of your family will come around i...Well done. Some of your family will come around in time, it is rare that no softening of hearts occurs.surakmnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05689927583758064853noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5100747061833336603.post-38287404876093782152011-01-05T11:37:15.944-08:002011-01-05T11:37:15.944-08:00Your letter is perfect. And, so is John's comm...Your letter is perfect. And, so is John's comment.<br /><br />Sending good and loving energy your way.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5100747061833336603.post-59609571356392571322011-01-05T09:43:47.614-08:002011-01-05T09:43:47.614-08:00Rob - this is heartbreaking. I hope your family w...Rob - this is heartbreaking. I hope your family will hear this plea to at least be open to learning more. It seems like so little to ask.<br /><br />If it's any comfort to you... When I came out to my grandmother, I was astonished when she told me about how she knew a young man in her ward in Pittsburgh in the 1930s who came out as gay, and eventually left for San Francisco when he found little acceptance in his ward. She said she hoped that things had changed since then, and that I would find more acceptance than he did. (My heart started dancing!)<br /><br />Then she said that she would never, ever accept the idea of gay marriage. (My heart sank.)<br /><br />Shortly after Göran and I entered into a relationship, my grandmother called me just before a family reunion. She said it was OK for Göran to come to the family reunion, but we would have to lie about the nature of our relationship. We wouldn't be allowed to speak openly about the fact that we were partners and we were to tell the family that we were just roommates. (My heart sank.) I told my grandmother that under those conditions, neither of us could attend the family reunion. She said OK and hung up. (Heart is breaking.)<br /><br />Five minutes later, my grandmother called back. She was in tears. She apologized for asking me to lie. She told me to come to the family reunion with my partner, no strings attached. She said the family would just have to deal. (Heart is rejoicing!)<br /><br />A few years later, when Göran and I decided to tie the knot in a formal commitment ceremony, my grandmother flew from Fresno to Minneapolis so that she could be present. I'm not sure she was completely OK with every aspect of it, and she asked a couple of awkward questions (like, "When you two are in bed, which one of you is the man and which one is the woman?" God bless her!). But we were so grateful for her presence. In fact, we were in awe of grandma.<br /><br />When she died a few years back, I cherished a close relationship with her, and some beautiful memories. She set an incredible example for the rest of the family...<br /><br />Right now, you get to be in the place of heartbreak and feeling lonely and wondering if your family will ever be the same to you again... I don't envy you. But you are also in a sacred place right now. Treasure the possibilities for growth that are ahead of you...John Gustav-Wrathallhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03557940681381951271noreply@blogger.com