23 May 2009

OGTs and OSTs

I wrote this for amusement a while back not intending to post it, but Sarah's recent list got me thinking and I thought why not. The fun with OSTs (Obviously Straight Traits) and OGTs (Obviously Gay Traits) pops up in the blogosphere from time to time so I thought I'd throw mine into the mix. It seemed like a good time to do it since I will be meeting up with a lot of friends again next Saturday (some for the first time) and I thought you might like a little more insight into this Rob guy. So at the risk of seeming shamelessly self-aggrandizing, herewith I open a window on your humble correspondent's hopelessly conflicted history. If you can figure out how all this somehow ended up inside one person, let me know!

OSTs

1. Had my first crush on a girl at age 6 (first kiss) and more afterward, enjoyed dating and managed a marriage that was successful for a little while at least
2. I love hiking, baseball, and sports bars, I play rugby and love the strain, the sweat, the pain, the yelling, the bruising competition
3. As a boy I would spend hours making scrapbooks of pictures of cars, organized by make and model year. I was also a self-taught dinosaur expert
4. I like James Bond movies, Kurosawa movies, and Ultimate Fight Club
5. I know basic kickboxing
6. I could watch Alicia Silverstone, Sophie Marceau, and Eva Green for hours. Even if they were asleep.
7. I like to build stuff with hand tools and the tool dept at Home Depot is as much fun as Williams-Sonoma
8. Airplanes fascinate me
9. Effeminacy really turns me off
10. I don't much care if the sink or shower hasn't been scrubbed for a couple weeks
11. I'm secure enough to wear a kilt in public and I enjoy all the female attention I get
12. Certain womens' perfumes really crank me up
13. I'm so straight-acting that some gay friends have accused me of being a closet straight guy
14. I hate to ask for directions

OGTs:

1. Did high school musical theater
2. Hated sports as a kid (how ironic)
3. Have a good eye for interior decorationg
4. Loved fragrances and cologne since I was a kid, picked out my first bottle when I was 9
5. Have no problems kissing my straight male friends on the cheek
6. I resent when female stars get top billing and I always watch the guys instead
7. Footrubs and watching old movies together while enjoying a cuddle on the sofa sounds really nice, and no, not with a girl
8. I love to cook and can't resist cookbooks or places like Williams-Sonoma or Sur La Table
9. I love flowers, especially roses
10. I instantly memorize the name of a handsome movie or TV star and will often forget the women
11. I have watched every ATWT episode on Youtube that has Luke & Noah in it
12. I unknowingly gravitated to the music and writings of a disproportionate number of composers and authors who were gay but I never knew about them until much later
13. I love "It's a Football Thing" on Youtube and think the kiss at the end is the sweetest thing I've ever seen (warning, some sidebar stuff is a little explicit)
14. I've actually known I was different ever since I was 14

Anybody else match any of these?

1 comment:

Sarah said...

Sorry, Alan. But one of your OSTs might actually also be an OGT--scrapbooking!

That reminds me of my grandfather, who was a draftsman and therefore had beautiful handwriting. He creatively scrapbooked his photos WAY before it was the thing to do.