23 May 2009

Sensory Overload

Take one huge theme park, outrageous roller coasters, raucous music, thousands of gay guys and gals, and throw Alan into the middle of it and what do you get? Near sensory overload, that's what you get.

Wow, what a party. I have never seen anything like it. Yeah, the music wasn't always quite to my taste, and yeah there was a little more smoking & drinking than I normally see, but meh, NBD. It was amazing. All the bills this weekend are on my nickel, I don't get reimbursed for weekend time, but I don't care, last night was SO worth it. I've never before been part of such a huge crowd with which I shared one particularly distinguishing characteristic!

I was lucky enough to be there with a bigger employee group so already knew a couple of people, and was even luckier enough to meet more and hang out with them for the rest of the night. Including one who's been to law school, and one who joined the LDS Church when he was young, then got to a point in his life where it had served its purpose for him. That's fine, doesn't bother me, everyone has their agency to choose. We all screamed and yelled our heads off on the coasters, ate horribly unhealthy food, talked about life and work and family and coming out and everything under the sun. It was 1 a.m. before I knew it. More smiles and back slaps and big affectionate hugs all round. What a contrast from a year ago when I was conflicted and fearful and wound tighter than a Citibank credit line. Now open, honest, no more duking it out with myself inside, accepting of who I am and accepted by others. SUCH exhilaration.

So to Greg, Nate, Shaun, Russ, Jason, Costas, and everyone else from last night's group: you are wonderful, amazing people and I feel so fortunate to know you. Thanks for making me feel so instantly welcomed and accepted. More and more I see why it's called "family", because that's exactly what it feels like! I am one lucky guy.


Ezra said...

Sounds like you had an awesome time!

Grégoire said...

Hey Alan,

I'm so glad to hear about your sensory overload!

You're a really great guy, you know. You work hard, take great care of your kids, and you have your priorities in order.

A bit of sensory overload is a normal part of a healthy adult life... and I know San Francisco can offer sensory overload to anybody much better than most other cities.

I'm really glad to hear you're taking a day for yourself, cutting loose and enjoying life.